Fell deeply in love with someone's "look and appearnace"?

I'm asking this for a friend...


she asked me this question and I don't even know how to answer...





"I fell in love with a boy deeply for..1 or 2 years already?


To be honest, I fell in love with him in the first place BECAUSE HE LOOKS SO BEAUTIFUL.


I thought when you love someone with their looks, you will get over them pretty fast....but I can't get over with him!!!





For example, in summer vacations when I won't be able to see him, I felt funny for my love toward him, and I won't miss him so much after the first few days(I kinda "forget" him).


When we get back to school, the first sight I landed on him pulled the love back to my heart. I started to love him crazily again.


Now I'm confused, do I even love him?


If I love him, why would I forget him when I don't see him?


If I don't love him or just love him from the look, why would I feel SO STRONG and CRAZY when I see him?

Fell deeply in love with someone's "look and appearnace"?
Shes right when she said that it wasnt love, its lust.


She is attracted to his appearance and most likely charisma, but not him for him. Thus its not real love.


However, lust can be just as powerful and control u as much as love can. I mean, have a look at all the ads, movies, tv shows, books etc. and u'll notice they either target people need for love and acceptance or their lust.


If she wants to get over him she can either a) try to stay away from him but then when she does see him again the same prob will keep occuring, or b) get to know him for him and try 2 c past his hot outward appearance, or finally c) be with him and then realise he wasnt that great after all.


;)
Reply:Love Vs. Lust? This has been debated over the years. We all experience our emotions at different levels, some stronger than others. Love is when you want to be in that person life. Lust is centralized towards sexual attraction, i.e. physical attraction. My own opinion is if this person is "Out of sight, out of mind" then there is no "love".
Reply:Natural response from Homo Sapien Female. Homosapians have mass amounts of a chemicals flow through body and brain. The first stage, lust, has to do with the chemicals estrogen and testosterone. Stage two is attraction. In stage two, your brain releases three chemicals: dopamine (also released when taking drugs), serotonin, and norepinephrine (adrenalin). Stage three is attachment. You can't stay in stage two forever, so the next stage is make it or break it. Oxytocin is released during "intimacy" that creates a bond between two people. Vasopressin is also released during stage three.





So basically, chemicals released by the brain determine who you fall in love with, and how long you stay together





Without these chemicals, you cant feel all the nuances of love. So basically you are addicted to this person.





As to why appearance, well it is because of 3.5 billion years of natural selection.
Reply:Has your friend ever talked to him? My ex boyfriend was absolutely amazing to look at, but he had such a violent side that no amount of attractiveness could keep me in love with him.





It's possible to fall in love with someone's "look and appearance" though. I've spent a lot of time just staring at someone because I thought they looked interesting.
Reply:she is only attracted to the irresistible looks of that guy.





let us not be deceived on outward beauty for it may last for a meantime. inward beauty is the most important factor.
Reply:Just to be straight up:





It's just a normal thing. At first appearances are what attracts us to someone else. The look of their eyes, the way they smile, they way that stand and walk, talk... all those things are just a normal part of 'falling in love.'





But, real love lasts through trials and tribulations and lasts. It's lasts more than anything because of one thing: commitment. Is there any commitment in appearances? Nope.





So unless there are other reasons that your friend has to love him... don't just assume it's love. But it's also nothing abnormal to love the way someone looks and be fixated on it when you are attracted to someone at first in a relationship. Even for a number of years.





Appearances and love are two different things but they are intertwined in relationships.